Brown chicken

So, today I decided to try my hand at something a little more complicated than microwavable brown rice. I love chicken, (I was nicknamed "Chicken King" as a young lad) so I'm delving into my grandfather's playbook (or cookbook) for inspiration. On the menu tonight is brown chicken; brown because I'm not a racist, and chicken because I love chicken...and you can never have too much protein.

Brown Chicken 

Ingredients: 3.5 lbs chicken wing drummettes, 2 tbs. hot bean sauce, chinese hot sauce, 3 cloves of garlic (chopped) , big pot (for water), and most importantly: OYSTER SAUCE.

Left: Hot Bean Sauce 辣豆瓣酱
2nd from Left: Chinese Hot Sauce
2nd from Right: Garlic (already chopped garlic if you are lazy like me to chop your own)
Right: OYSTER SAUCE

*I use drummettes because there are no hormones added. The frozen wings that supermarkets carry are injected with hormones, concentrated at the wings, so as to increase the size of the chicken. Hormones are very very VERY bad for your health...and thus, this proves that size does not always matter.

1) Boil water in a huge pot

2) Dump the chicken wing drummetes into the huge pot of boiling water.

*This process is called parboiling: partial boiling of the food so as to remove poisonous or foul-tasting substances

3) Using a wooden spoon/spatula (or any stirring utensil), stir the contents inside the water. You'll notice that there's some funk that detaches itself from the chicken. The stirring action makes sure that all that gunk is separated from the chicken. YOU DO NOT WANT THAT IN YOUR DISH. It tastes disgusting, and you will throw up. 100% guaranteed.

4) Once you've stirred and the water has come to a boil, dump the gunk (not the chicken) into the sink. When the container becomes noticeably lighter, pour the chicken into a colander.

*mine is red because red is the color of spiciness and heat, which is how I like my chicken...and women. I also place a bowl underneath the colander to catch excess liquids.

5) Turn the stove to its "high" setting. Drizzle some olive oil and garlic into a wok while SIMULTANEOUSLY adding 2 tbs. of hot bean sauce and a heaping dollop of chinese spicy sauce onto the chicken.

6) Wait until the garlic begins to "dance" and smell oh so fragrant, then dump the chicken (gently) into the wok and stir the contents vigorously so as to evenly distribute the hot sauce throughout the chicken.

7) While stirring the chicken, add water into the wok until the water level almost covers the chicken.

*Hopefully, your dish looks similar to mine. Again, this is a complicated recipe and does require some complex maneuvers. If yours doesn't look like the picture above, that's ok. Not everybody has a college degree.


8) Cover the wok and allow your delicious drummettes to boil. Once it boils, turn down the heat (to a low-medium setting) and allow the contents to simmer. Now would be a good time to take a restroom break or text your girlfriend.

9) Afterwards, add oyster sauce and sugar to achieve desired taste. Now, everybody's taste buds are different. For me, I use at least 4 tablespoons of oyster sauce and at least 2 tablespoons of sugar. But remember, TASTE YOUR FOOD. If you don't learn anything else from my blogs, learn this!!!

10) Allow the contents to simmer at the low-medium heat for about 15-20 minutes.

11) Voila! It's done! All your hard work for the past hour have gone to producing this delicious feast of the gods.

I love my grandfather, 公公, for teaching this dish to me.

Remember, always stir the contents. That's the key to allowing the drummettes to soak up the delicate flavors of the hot sauce, oyster sauce, and sugar. It's what allows the dish to develop a flavor profile! (Thank you Top Chef for that doozy of a word)

Lastly, I will finish off my sexy salmon recipe tomorrow. In addition, flip the salmon in its bag today, so both sides will soak in the succulent marinade and will create an even taste when we cook the salmon.

Till tomorrow....au revoir!